The Scariest month of my life

The past 6 weeks have been

A roller coaster....

And not one of the smooth roller coasters

With it's exciting ups and downs and twirls...

But more like one of the old wooden coasters

That tweaks your neck

And sometimes goes off the tracks.

(Aka Lakeside amusement park).

This roller coaster of emotion was all

Due to some health issues

I started having  (again) about 3 months ago....

Here is a little back story:

I have epilepsy.
I have been on and off seizure meds since i was 11.

I decided to wean off my anti seizure meds back in March,

They have a lot of side effects that are 

Pretty crappy and growing up I only had about 10 seizures....

So I figured I could go off my meds again.

Well, I was wrong!

It took several months to wean off the meds,

And I did great for a while!

But things started happening again in august,

And things got really bad last month.

I was having between 8 and 30 seizures each day

(Most of them taking place during the night),

I was exhausted!

Imagine the tiredness you feel after having a baby and waking up 

Every 2 hours, and multiply that by 100.

Every time I had a seizure, I would wake up in a panicked

Aura and than the seizure would start.

We couldn't find a natural way to stop

Them....

This went on for 2 weeks before my neurologist said I needed to start the meds again.

Back in march I swore I would never take those meds again

Because I hated the side effects.

Well, after two weeks of living like a zombie I went on the meds again.

But this time they didn't work!

My seizures got worse and one night I had 8 seizures in a 30 minute time span.

I was sooo scared, I really thought I was going to die 

Because they would not stop.

We ended up increasing my meds to a higher dose

And it finally started working after about a week

Never before have I been so grateful for medicine...

Because until that medicine started working, 

I was wondering how I was going to function in Utah...

How were we going to afford

An adult babysitter who

Could sit at our house all day

While Shaun was at work.

I couldn't have a seizure alone with the kiddos...

What if I fell and hit my head and the boys were home alone with

An unconscious mother for hours?

All of these thoughts went on for almost 3 weeks, and I felt I was losing my independence 

At the worst time possible....we were moving to another state,
and I started to think it was not a good idea,
but it was also too late, cuz we had a contract on a home.
An awesome lil home, that I wanted so badly to live in.

Anyway, things have finally stopped seizing!!!

The inspection on the home went great!!!

The closing went smoothly!!!

And Shaun got the job at USU!!!

It was a scary month,
it was the scariest month of my life.
I am soo ready to settle down!

Shaun moves out on Monday and I will fly with the kiddos
on the following Saturday...if you have ever met our lil Shiloh,
you know why I am flying and not driving with him!